What kind of Asshole writes a blog?

I think the reason I can't sympathize with anyone anymore is because of fear. I used to always feel alone, which made me feel less than other people, and made it easier for me to understand when other people were upset. Having the perception that your worse than everyone also makes it easy to want to help other people, because you feel as though their problems are more important. However, I have gained some undeserved self-worth, and now value my personal desires over others, and find myself to generally be more important than others. This makes me a douche bag. The fact that I'm writing this, makes me a self-hating douche bag. I'm not truly sure which is worse. It is odd though that regardless whether I hold myself in high or low esteem, I feel unhappy. Maybe I'd be happy if I can find a perfect balance between the two. But I'm tired of having to find equilibrium all the time. So, I think I should go back to being alone, that way I face my greatest fear, don;t have to be a douche bag, an might just be able to help all those people who are better than me.